


Still

by LFMH021



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: And Yuuri finding ways to make Victor feel better, Basically Victor crying over his thinning hair and age, Fluff, Kinda angsty but more fluffy, Kinda dialogue-y, Look I just love Phichit so he's always in my fics, M/M, Mild Angst, Post S1 Ep12, Pre Season 2 if ever it will exist, Slice of Life, Sorry I tried my best, That's it, They're already in Russia here, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Victor crying, Victor is showered with affection, Victuuri!!!, What am I doing with my life?, kinda OOC, self indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-13 22:13:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9144466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LFMH021/pseuds/LFMH021
Summary: Anything concerning his age had always been a sensitive topic for Victor. Yuuri knew about this, but he still didn’t expect to find Victor crying over his thinning hair and growing age when he arrived back home earlier than expected to their apartment in St. Petersburg.No, he’s not going to approach his fiancé and say: ‘Oh, I’m just surprised you’re crying,’ again. This time he knew what he needed to do. And he needed others’ help for it.Victor was just realizing how loved he really is by the people around him. And he wasn’t expecting the way it was expressed.





	

**Author's Note:**

> *jumps from one genre to another* PARKOUR! OH HELLO THERE; HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! LET’S ALL WELCOME 2017 AND THE SURPRISES IT HAS IN STORE! [I hope YOI Season 2 is part of it.]
> 
> And I have made a resolution that I will try my best to write an update or a one-shot everyday for the YOI Fandom [until my stock of ideas lasts anyway] until Season Two starts to air, [I know that YOI won’t fail us] because that new season might bring new revelations, new characters and new stuff so I gotta wait it out again.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for all of your kudos, comments, subscriptions and even for following me on Tumblr and Twitter – they mean a lot to me and made my 2016 even better. Thank you!
> 
> I had always wanted to tackle this, so ta-dah! This is my New Year’s first one-shot! It will be shitty. But all I do are shitty, so yeah, used to it. 
> 
> This is just a sorry excuse for me to write a fluffy yet mildly angst-y Victuuri one-shot. Humor me. Angst and Fluff [and now Innuendo] lets my blood flow.
> 
> It might get a little OOC, so I apologize in advance. I’ll try my hardest!
> 
> Enjoy!

 

Victor hummed before opening his eyes. He blinked thrice and then rubbed the sleep out of his system. He patted the space beside him and realized that it was empty and quite cold already. He sat up immediately in panic and looked around their shared bedroom in St. Petersburg, Russia only to find no Yuuri. Sleepiness long forgotten, he slipped his feet in his slippers and stood up to walk outside their room and around the house.

Makkachin, who had also woken up after he did, followed after him, wagging his tail and tongue lolling out of his mouth. He barked happily when Victor bent a little and scratched behind his ears.

Chuckling, Victor padded towards the living room and found it empty as well. He looked at the wall clock. It read ten in the morning. Yakov and Lilia were out of town for two days and told them to take those as day-offs to rest which was why he and Yuuri stayed up late last night showing each other their love and ended up sleeping at one-seventeen in the morning.

“Yuuri?” He poke his head out towards the yard. “Yuuri?” He asked and looked in the kitchen. “Yuuri?” He repeated, a little louder now towards nowhere and everywhere. “Yuuri!” He yelled and crossed his arms when he received no response in return.

It had been two weeks ever since Yuuri moved in, in St. Petersburg, Russia. And it has been half a month since the two of them begun to live in the same apartment that Victor had always rented. He was going to avail it fully soon just so that he could officially call this their home. He, Yuuri and Yurio were mostly in their training rink so he knew that the Japanese was still not accustomed with his new environment, which was Victor was growing worried every minute.

Makkachin barked behind him. He turned and found his poodle staring at their fridge. He heaved a sigh and approached Makkachin before chiding his pet with, “Makkachin, the food inside is not for you. Your food is right—“

His poodle barked again and nosed something on the fridge’s door. He squinted and realized that it was memo plastered on the fridge door with a fridge magnet – it was a miniature Yu-topia Akatsuki and he adored it. He quickly grabbed the note and read its’ contents: _Hey, Vitya. I just went out to buy the ingredients for our lunch and dinner in the nearest market place – I’ve walked around that area lots of times already, so don’t worry. Would probably arrive back home at 11:15-11:30. Behave please and don’t set the apartment in fire or I will divorce you. Makkachin needs to eat as well, don’t forget! I’ll see you later. – Yuuri K._

Laughing, he hugged the note tightly. Call him a hopeless romantic or overly dramatic, but he absolutely loved receiving simple notes like this. And to receive them from his special someone was even greater because it felt so domestic.

He roamed his eyes around his –no, their—apartment and heaved a sigh of contentment. He had been living alone in here for years, it usually smelled of his cologne or Makkachin but now, Yuuri’s orange-y scent lingered all around. He noticed the bits of things that were Yuuri’s too here and there – the Japanese’s onigiri plushie, his favourite book, his blue slippers that had piggy ears, his training shoes— and it made Victor feel warm all over.

He was usually lonely when he arrives home back when he was still so focused on figure skating that he neglected his life and love but now, he’d grown to love this place although he’d actually prefer Hasetsu now – it just felt more like the home he had always wanted and dreamed of.

Victor immediately placed Yuuri’s note inside his memory box pile before preparing his poodle’s food. Makkachin dug in the moment he set his dog’s food container on the ground. Chuckling, he then headed to the bathroom to prepare for the day.

 

He took a shower and then wore his pink robe before padding back to their bedroom. Makkachin was back on the bed, watching him happily. He put on a long-sleeve black shirt and then gray sweatpants before slipping his slippers back on. He was grabbing his phone when he caught sight of himself in the full-body mirror inside their bedroom.

Blinking, he looked straight at himself and even far away, he noticed the way his hair was becoming even greyer. As he lifted up a hand to run it on his previously long hair, he couldn’t pretend to not notice that it was thinning. He took a deep breath and approached the mirror and looked at his reflection.

He was just twenty-eight years old and truthfully, that was still quite young. But as someone who grew up loving figure skating, breaking world records one after another and then showing himself almost every day in the media, he had grown quite conscious of the way he looked.

Every single day that the sun rose was also a day closer to his retirement. Every single day closer to his retirement meant he was growing older.

He averted his gaze towards the ground and gritted his teeth.

It hurt.

He had always known it was inevitable but that didn’t mean it was still a fact that was easy to accept.

Victor didn’t even know when but as he looked back up at his reflection, he realized that tears were streaming down his cheeks.

He grabbed a spare, dry towel and covered the full-body mirror before sitting down on the edge of their bed. He took deep breaths but more tears dropped down onto his lap. He tried to stop himself because he believed it was a childish thing to cry about but that thought only made him sob harder.

Victor wiped the continuous tears but his sobs turned to cracking hiccups and whimpers when Makkachin went down the bed and then placed his chin on top of Victor’s lap. He looked down at his poodle and found Makkachin staring at him sadly, as if he was asking him what’s wrong.

He wrapped his arms around his long-time companion and continued on sobbing. It was still early. Yuuri was still going to be out for about half an hour or more – he could cry his heart out and then pretend nothing happened once his fiancé arrived. He didn’t want the brunet to worry. He didn’t want to burden Yuuri with an immature problem when the Japanese was already suffering with anxiety attacks now and then.

Makkachin would understand. Makkachin would keep quiet about it.

 

Yuuri hummed joyously with grocery bags in his hands before dropping off the bus. “Spasibo,” He said to the driver and then proceeded to walk towards their apartment’s street.

He lifted his left hand and looked at his wristwatch. It read: 10:42. He smiled and walked faster, excited to try cooking that new recipe that he had learned from his mother through their video call before.

He woke up at about eight-thirty. And then decided to go out and buy ingredient at nine-fifteen. Since his phone was slow at turning on, he decided to leave a note on the fridge instead. After petting Makkachin, he quietly departed to the nearby marketplace. Victor was asleep soundly from the moment he aroused until he left.

And now, he managed to buy all of the ingredients he needed and even got some fruits, yoghurts and the ice cream he and Victor loved since it was a sale in the marketplace. He was lucky he went early since there was no traffic and he arrived back home earlier than usual.

He twisted the front door’s knob and slipped inside their home after removing his shoes. He put on his slippers and instead of walking to the kitchen, he decided to check if his fiancé was already awake.

Yuuri blinked when he saw the door an inch ajar open. He tiptoed and peeped through the inch, and his eyes widened with the sight he wasn’t expecting to see.

Victor was crying on their bed with Makkachin in his arms wrapped tightly in a hug. He held his breath as his fiancé cried with heart-wrenching sobs. He badly wanted to burst inside and hug Victor but he also wanted to find out why the Russian was crying in the first place.

His prayers for answers was answered when Makkachin licked Victor’s hand and whimpered at the silver-head. Victor hiccupped and brushed the poodle’s ears gently before smiling ruefully. “Makkachin, you’re fifteen years old already. Feel old yet?” He asked in the best teasing tone he could manage.

Makkachin whimpered again before resting his chin on Victor’s lap.

“I’ve had you since I was twelve. Remember? I still had long hair back then and I cried in happiness when Yakov took me to a pet shop for my birthday. He told me to look for a pet I want to take care of so that I’d learn to be more responsible. The moment our eyes met, I knew you’re the companion I was longing for,” Victor murmured and then nuzzled his nose on his poodle’s head. “Look, fifteen years have passed. You’ve grown so big. And here I am…” He paused and looked at their now-covered full-body mirror.

Yuuri held back his tears as the silver-head reached for his hair and held tightly onto a lock of silver hair. “…Here I am, growing old as well. Eyebags that cannot be hidden with make-up. Wrinkles that age brings. And of course, my blasted hair is thinning out as if I needed more reminders that I’m growing older every day.” Victor looked up at ceiling, clearly trying not to tear up anymore.

Yuuri’s heart clenched tightly when big, angry tears trailed down those pale cheeks he always loved caressing. Victor clenched his teeth and shut his eyes. “I know it’s unavoidable but…” He faltered and sniffed. He bowed his head and then went and buried his face on Makkachin’s lush fur. “I’m so sorry for looking so weak. I’m so sorry, Makkachin. I just don’t want to burden Yuuri with this immature problem of mine.”

Their bedroom which was usually filled with laughter now echoed Victor’s heartbreaking wails. Yuuri took a deep breath and walked quietly out of the house. He perched his back against the wall at their yard, far away from where Victor could find him, and waited. He still had twenty minutes before the time he wrote on that note he left.

So he sat on the grass and thought, thought and thought.

Thought of ways he could make Victor feel better. After minutes of brainstorming, he lifted his gaze and stared hard in front of him. He then took out his phone, put it on vibrate mode and started messaging people.

He pretended to just have arrived at 11:23. He walked in and shouted, “Victor! Makkachin! I’m back!” He tried his best to smile as if he didn’t witness his fiancé wailing earlier when Victor and Makkachin ran out of the bedroom and lunged at him for hugs.

“Yuuri! I missed you~” The Russian whined and clung to him with a big smile.

Chuckling, he patted Victor, who had managed to not look puffy and red-eyed.

 

They were practicing when Yakov approached him. Victor grinned widely. “Hello!” He blinked when his coach stared at him hard. “What? Did I do something wrong again?” He grumbled.

Yakov shook his head and then patted Victor’s shoulder. “I don’t know. I just realized when we were away that you had been my student ever since you started skating.”

His heart thumped loud but he laughed anyway. He had to. “Oh yeah? Growing tired of me yet?”

Yakov smiled exasperatedly and said, “Vitya, you’re already twenty-eight years old—“

“—I know. You don’t need to remi—“

“—But your skating is still as beautiful as it had been when you were younger,” Yakov continued.

He halted and stared, wide-eyed at his long-time coach. “O-Okay. Where is this coming from?” He wasn’t prepared with the effect those words would cause him.

Yakov shrugged and walked towards Yurio, who was in the farthest corner of the rink yelling at Yuuri while the brunet laughed and went along. “Vitya,” The older added before he was out of hearing range. “You’re still the Victor Nikiforov everyone loves whether you’re long haired, short-haired or even bald. Remember that.”

He wasn’t even able to say ‘thank you’ in surprise.

 

He jumped when Yurio yelled at his ear, “OI, VICTOR!”

He turned and found a grumpy Yurio glaring up at him. “Oh, Yurio? What’s up?” He asked, rubbing his ear because he was hearing static with how loud the blond shouted at it.

“I was calling your name ever since earlier. Mila bought some afternoon snacks and she asked me to call for you.”

He frowned. “You were calling me since earlier?” He echoed.

Yurio rolled his eyes. “Yeah. I was yelling, ‘OI, VICTOR!’ a million times. I got tired and walked here instead to screa, right at your ear since you’re growing deaf.”

He tilted his head in the side. “…You called me ‘Victor’?”

The blond looked away. “YEAH! SO WHAT, ASSHOLE? THAT’S YOUR NAME RIGHT?”

He laughed. “Well, I’m just used with you calling me ‘old geezer’ or something,” He explained.

Yurio suddenly looked at him, solemn and quiet.

He backed away. That didn’t look like a Yurio-expression he wanted to encounter. “Uh, what?”

The blond sighed and then rubbed his head. “I might call you ‘old geezer’ but I’m an angsty fuck of a teenager, Victor. Don’t always take me literally.”

Yurio wasn’t exactly great at saying what he really meant but Victor could discern apology when he was given one. And he just received one from Yuri Plisetsky. It was as if a heavy and invisible barrier and gap between them evaporated at the least. He smiled widely. “Thank you, Yurio~!”

“You fuck! I told you not to call me that! Now come on or I will eat your snacks as well!” The blond growled, red-faced with embarrassment, and stormed back towards where the other skaters were huddled together. Victor enthusiastically followed at him. “OI, KATSUDON! WHAT FLAVOR OF JUICE DID YOU LEAVE FOR ME? It better not be the grape one, I despise those.”

Yuuri who was busy conversing with Mila and Georgi looked up and answered, “The pirozhki one.”

“You bastard! As if one exists!” Yurio snapped.

“Oh, I left you the grape one.”

“Fuck you! I’d take that pirozhki bullshit of a juice if it existed instead.”

 

It was another day. He went towards the dressing/locker room ahead of Yuuri since the brunet was called out by Yakov and Lilia outside of the room, Makkachin stayed with the Japanese.

He gasped and halted in his tracks when he saw the changes he never expected.

You see, there were bulletin boards where various pictures of the skaters and their coaches were pasted on. One was dedicated for Yakov and his students. He gingerly walked towards theirs and couldn’t believe his eyes.

The part where photos of him were pasted on was changed. Just yesterday, it was still filled with photos of him from his photoshoots, interviews and when he was on the podium – some were kind of old since he took a break after all.

But now, they were different. The photos of him were stolen ones from various Instagram accounts. Some were from Chris at last and this years’ banquets. Some were from Yurio back when they were still living in Hasetsu. Some were from Mila and Georgi when they were watching him as he coached and watched Yuuri in the board/barrier in last season’s GPF. Some were from Phichit and these photos were of him when he ran to the Kiss and Cry back in the Cup of China, when he kissed Yuuri, when they announced their engagement, and several more.

Even the others’ were different. They were all new ones wherein Victor was already twenty-seven or twenty-eight already. Most of the photos were casual ones and not where he was stiff just to take photos and be done with it.

It made his heart swell in happiness. He didn’t need to look at them and remember that they were from his past anymore. These pictures were of him as he was now.

He turned. Mila and Georgi had just entered. “Oh? You saw them already? I and Georgi stayed behind yesterday to change them since they’re so old and stiff-looking. We wanted to see ourselves as we are today. We even added a portion for Yuuri since he’s part of our rink family now~” Mila said.

“Hope you liked those shots. My favourite is the one when you were crying after Yuuri performed his Yuri on Ice and managed to land your specialty quad flip,” Georgi added.

He couldn’t help himself and hugged the two tightly.

The two spluttered in surprise before chuckling and hugging him back.

 

He spat his drink in shock when Lilia passed by him one day in the rink and said, “When was the last time I taught you, Vitya?”

He straightened up unconsciously and answered, “F-Five years ago?”

“Ah, such a long time then.”

He nodded and pursed his lips. Where was this conversation going?

Lilia glanced at him and said with a small smile, “You’re still as lovely as ever. Your _skating_ is still as amazing as ever. I may not be one of your teachers anymore but I do hope for the best for you and of course, to your…fiancé, Yuuri.” She averted his gaze to Yuuri who was gliding on the ice while talking on his phone. He was pretty sure it was Phichit because the Japanese suddenly turned red and then laughed. “You’re both beautiful. I am glad Yuri chose to look up to both of you and not at those that are too arrogant.”

He gulped and smiled hugely. “Thank you, Madam.”

She hummed and walked towards Yurio. “Yuri, I saw that! It was too stiff! From the top!”

He wasn’t sure why he was receiving such gestures and words so suddenly but he truly appreciated them. He breathed on his hands with a big, happy smile on his face.

 

On their next day off, he received another set of surprises when he opened his Instagram account. He spluttered when he found lots of videos tagged at him – from people he knew even. Makkachin was sleeping on his lap. And Yuuri was arranging his planner and calculating their budget and expenses for the month. Gulping, he opened them one by one.  

It was Chris and a video of himself. “Hiya, coach Victor! No, I am not going to nut on this video, that would be rude. And no, I am not naked right now. I am actually snuggling with my precious cat and boyfriend, too much detail? But anyway, I had known you for years now and we had stood up in the same podium several times. You were my inspiration ever since I saw you skating when we first met. That blue rose you gave me is stuck between pages of my favourite book – I look at it whenever I feel like I am too old already to continue competing, and it gives me strength. Know why? I would always remember the you back then – long haired, graceful, beautiful. And then remember the you now – short haired, graceful, beautiful _and_ happy. I’m happy to see you happy, Victor. And yes, we’re growing old, but we’ve managed to create history, so stay happy. Age shouldn’t be a fear of yours. It should be fear _you_ since I’m one hundred percent sure you’ll still remain stunning even if you’re already eighty. And that’s it! Time’s up! See you soon!”

The next one was JJ’s. It was short and as obnoxious as he anticipated. “Hello there, Victor! Age doesn’t matter! Well, it does, but my point is skate as long as you can skate. Age should never hinder you! Look at me! Oh, wait, I’m still young. But you get my point! I—“ Victor didn’t finish the video and pretended to just have heard the fourth sentence the Canadian said.

He even received one from Otabek but it was just a video of the Kazakh’s note. He chuckled because he knew how much the Kazakh hated social media sites so he appreciated the effort of taking a video of a note. He received one from Altin, it was enough. It read: ‘You’ll remain as a living legend whatever your age will be. People will look at you and say: ‘he’s beautiful, so beautiful’ even if you’re already retired. Skaters will stare at you in awe even if you just manage a glide on the ice when you’ve turned fifty. You’ll always be the figure skating world’s living legend, Victor Nikiforov. Salute.”

He opened more videos. A very warm message from Leo de la Iglesia. One cute and flustered one from a little embarrassed Guang Hong Ji. An energetic and loud message from a jumping Minami Kenjiro – he lowered the volume because even Makkachin jumped in shock when the video begun. Of course, Phichit sent one and it was actually funny and yet aweing at the same time – must be why Yuuri loved the Thai so much. More from other former rinkmates. He even got some from previous competitors. Even his competitors’ coaches sent him videos or posted photos of him with messages for him in the captions. The last one he opened was posted by Minako Okukawa.

He shakily held his phone as he realized that the Nishigori Family, Katsuki Family and some other patrons of Yu-topia Akatsuki and Ice Castle Hasetsu were all visible and present in the video. Their message wasn’t long but it held all the meaning they wanted to throw across. “We love and adore you the way you were, are and will be, Victor Nikiforov!” And then they waved photos and posters of him – when he was young and of him right now.

It made him tear up. He sniffed and tried not to cry again when a Messenger Call interrupted him – a video call from Phichit Chulanont. He pressed the green button. “Phichit,”

The Thai smiled. “Hello, Victor! Have you seen the posts, photos and videos tagged with you?”

He sniffed and glared at his fiance’s best friend. “I’m literally sobbing here. You think?” He grunted. “Did you do this?”

Phichit laughed. “Nope. Who lives with you and probably saw you feeling miserable about your age?”

“Makkachin?” He answered.

The Thai pouted. “You know, I am so tempted to go there and smack your head because of that answer of yours. Did you really think Makkachin can contact us and ask us to spread his little request just so that you will stop feeling terrible everytime you look at the mirror?”

“…Well, I don’t know what he does when we’re asleep.” He knew what and who the Thai meant. Of course, he does. But he was just beginning to realize now.

Phichit snorted. “Just go to Yuuri, will you?”

He nodded and stood up. “Thank you.”

The Thai shook his head. “He only asked me to pass the message. He’s the one who made the most effort. Oh, I gotta go. Bye!”

“Goodbye, thank you still.” With that, he hung up and ran towards their bedroom.

 

He slammed the door open and threw himself at Yuuri, who was sitting on the bed with his planner on his lap. The brunet yelped and caught him automatically. They ended up lying on their bed. He wrapped his arms tightly around his fiancé and buried his face on the Japanese’s chest. It felt like home. Home he had always wished for. “I love you. I love you. I love you,” He murmured in happiness. This was the first time in his life he had teared up so much.

Yuuri chuckled and intertwined their hands. They fit so well. Like puzzle pieces that finally found their way back together. “You’ve found out then…?”

He looked up and found Yuuri blushing while looking down at him. He smiled widely and hugged the brunet tighter. How did he deserve such a lovely, caring and adoring fiancé? “How did you know…?”

The Japanese fidgeted and mumbled embarrassed, “I saw you crying days ago when I went out grocery shopping. I pretended that I didn’t know. I, for one, know that I am not so great with words so I thought of some other way to reassure you that your age doesn’t matter and that even if your hair’s thinning –although I still think it’s thick and shiny—you’re still as beautiful as ever…and then I messaged Phichit and we got this idea. Well, _I_ got this idea and he proposed to spread it. I talked to Yakov, Yurio, Lilia, Mila and Georgi when you’re unaware and busy and then I told Phichit that today’s our next day off and to make sure the posts would be posted today.”

His gaze averted towards the box beside the closet with the word: ‘Posters’ on it. Yuuri followed his eyes’ direction and laughed. “And, oh, yes. I also hid the posters of you since I wanted to you to know that I…uh…love you for you. Not just the skating legend I idolized all this time. Though, I left one behind – your latest. Couldn’t help myself.”

“You did all of this for me?” He asked, feeling so loved, he think his heart would burst.

The brunet blushed even more and nodded. “It was the only way I could think of. I hope my feelings and words I cannot say truly out loud managed to cross the bridge and reach you anyway.”

He leaned and captured those sweet and soft lips with his. “They did,” He murmured and kissed Yuuri again. “They really did.”

“I’m glad,” The brunet whispered back and planted a kiss full of meaning on Victor’s forehead.

That day, he removed the cover of the full-body mirror and started to love his hair, appearance and reflection again.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was another mess.
> 
> It was boring.
> 
> It was shitty.
> 
> It was OOC.
> 
> It was so dialogue-y.
> 
> I'm sorry.
> 
>  
> 
> I actually didn't like much how this turned out because I got stuck in the middle finding ways on how Victor will receive the reassurance he needed. I wanted to stop in the middle but thought against it. I started it, I had to end it one way or another, hahaha.
> 
> Anyway, KUDOS AND COMMENTS ARE SUPER APPRECIATED! I LOVE READING YOUR THOUGHTS BECAUSE YOU'RE SO APPRECIATIVE, I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH! 
> 
> Yell at me on Tumblr with how shitty this was @ lovefadesminehas021
> 
> And on Twitter @ LFMH021
> 
> THANKS!


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